One of the wisest saying a friend once told me was this:
“There is no right way to do the
wrong thing, but there is a wrong way to do the right thing”
Simply if you are doing something wrong, it
won’t be right no matter how well you do it. Yet there are times when we are
doing the “right” thing yet do so in a way that will not be effective or just may
cause more problems.
I think that is
exactly what Paul is dealing with in the book of Philemon. He knows that he
could simply order Philemon to accept back his runaway slave Onesimus. He had
the right to do so both as an apostle and by the authority of the Scriptures.
Yet he didn’t do it that way.
Therefore,
though I have enough confidence in Christ to order you to do what is proper, yet for love's sake I rather appeal to you—
Philemon 1:8-9
Instead, he appeals
to him. He appeals to his personal relationship, to Philemon’s integrity, to his
confidence in him to do the right thing, and to the hope of a positive outcome.
Paul goes out of his way not to force Philemon by compulsion but rather his own
choice. It not enough to have him do the right thing but for him to be able to
choose to do it.
Our world today has
fallen into the trap that we should force people to what they think is the
right thing (even when it may be far from right, but that is a whole other
issue). That may put us on the “right side” of an argument but it may not do anything
good. Force often causes resentment and rebellion, even when it’s done for a positive
reason.
Paul knew that for
love's sake the easiest, bluntest approach might not be the wisest. Maybe we
should too.
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